Absent Without Longing
Absent Without Longing
The Moving On Of Love And The Love Of Moving On
Welcome to fiction “From The Future” for this entry.
Congratulations, you have stumbled on a work-in-progress, it will not be emailed. It will change. What you see right now, will not remain the same. It will change.
This is also a new drafted chapter for a novel, “RETRIEVE”, being written this year.
Future + Fiction is the formula for everything, whether it’s an essay, story or chapter.
These long pieces are best read online, via the Substack App, when you have fifteen minutes.
Part One
The Island, Pacific Ocean
Zero Eight Hours, Hour 6 of 48 Hours
“Everybody down,” signaled Eris, “I think we got compan…”
“How many do you…,” asked Sparks, right before he pinwheeled back. Flocks of death flew between the team, invisible sparrows of steel. Visors weren’t enough, ears deafened or burst.
The Thing, whatever it was, The Island, a nasty bit of it, was back.
“It’s back for more!!”
“Where…?”
“There!”
JustJohn dragged himself forward on the ground, “Hats, Hats!”
“Skipper, over there!”
“Skippers gone,” said Two, before he let loose with a grenade. There was no explosion, “a dud, it’s a…”
Stephen couldn’t stop breathing fast, heartbeat banging heavy in his ringing ears. Someone shoved him back, “Move, move, I told you to stay behind me!,” said Bella, “Eris! I need you to..!”
“I’ve got it, Bel. Ready??” Both of them, each harnessed to a special field piece, nodded before going “Three… Two… One!” Before Bella could say anything else, both of them were blown backwards, “Eris!”
Stephen crawled over to Bella, “Hey, hey, it’s coming back!!” Bella and Eris were unconscious. Stephen tried to shake Bella awake but couldn’t push hard. Bella’s eyes opened, half-lidded, she said, “Red Box, red box….” The Thing was further away, blasted back by Bella and Eris, distracted by someone else firing at it, “Come here, you bastard, I’m here, I’m waiting for you! I’m…” It was Sparks.
Stephen looked around, and couldn’t focus on anything, until a red blur, a red box. The red box! He crawled as fast as he could, it was hard to move one of his legs, there was warm wetness and pain. He screamed the moment he tried to stand to run towards the box. He could see JustJohn lying on his side, as he screamed while firing at the Thing. Sparks was kneeling next to him, also firing. The Skipper was face down, “Two” was trying to press on “Hat’s” abdomen, covered in blood, while Hats screamed.
The red box, the red box…
Stephen made it to the box, stenciled with, “O.V. SLN - Defense ”, with a latch marked, “PULL HERE”. He tried, but the blood made it hard to grip. He used both hands. The red box made a metallic clacking sounds as supports popped out and the top of the red box popped open with a crack, with a hinge on one side. It clicked and black armature with a small goggleviewer. It blinked and said in a steady monotone, “READY… READY… View Target….” Stephen was confused for a moment - how the f… what do I do?? Then calmed himself a moment. The viewer! He bent down, crouched against the red box and stuck his face against the goggleviewer and saw everything through the redbox’s eyes.
The Thing was a dark blob with legs and arms, changing shape, like a black cloud of rock.
The Red Box blinked “Target? Speak. Target? Speak. Target?…”
“Yes, damn it, Target… that’s the Target..!”
“Target Selected. Charging. Ready to Fire. Fire?”
“Yes, yes, fire, fire!!!”
A strange sharp popping sound made Stephen flinch back, as a red blurs popped from inside the box into the air and began to whir, and sped in the direction of The Thing. Just as Sparks screamed from taking a hit and fell back and Hats passed out, multiple explosions burst from inside the Thing. By then, Bella was back on her feet, and pulled Eris back towards Stephen and the Red Box.
“Again, cycle it again!,”screamed Bella.
“Again?” Stephen realized and looked down through the goggles.
“Reloading… Reloading… Target? Speak. Targe…”
“Yes, yes,” yelled Stephen, as he looked through the view at the thing, which appeared to broken but it was moving, slower but still moving towards them.
“Fire!! Fire!!” The red box’s little red deaths popped up, and still made Stephen flinch, and the flew towards the Thing. For some reason, they exploded before reaching it.
“Oh God!” Stephen looked down to try firing the Red Box again.
“Target Selec…”
“Damn it, yes, yes, fire!,” screamed Stephen. There was a clanking sound and then a loud bang. Nothing. Stephen tried again and again nothing. He began hitting his with the palms of his hands, “Come on, come on, I said yes, fire, fire!!”
“RECHARGING… RECHARGING….”
“No time, Get out of here!,” yelled Bella.
Bella grabbed Stephen by one of his elbows and pulled him away from the red box, while she held Eris up, “Let’s move!”
The Thing roared from wherever its mouth was.
Bella braced herself to fire again. The field piece also said, “Charging. Charging.”
“I can fire one more time. Take Eris, take her. As soon as I fire the box, I’m going to shoot to distract it. Run back to the shore, and pop smoke, signal for help.”
“What are you doing?,” said Eris, trying to push off Bella, as Bella grabbed Eris’ field piece from her chest harness.
“Go with the kid, and get to the shore.”
“We can all make it to shore!”
“No, when I say, make a run for it.”
“CHARGE READY,” chimed the Red Box.
Bella nodded to the foilage, “Get ready.”
Bella fired with her field piece, lowest setting, to distract the Thing.
Then she yelled at the Red Box, “Fire!” As the Red Box unleashed its final salvo of little red death at the Thing, Bella yelled at Stephen, “Run! Run!!” as explosions tore at the Thing from inside. Stephen and Eris limped past the edge of the clearing. Through the smoke, and they turned to look at Bella taking aim with her field piece, she was on a bent knee, bracing herself for blowback. There was roar, perhaps from The Thing.
“Eris tapped Stephen and shook her head, let’s go, kid.” They ran as quick as they could under the cover of the jungle. They could hear firing. Eris chuckled, which shocked Stephen, “That’s the Bella I know. You don’t want to see this, we should…”
Before Eris could say another word, someone yelled, “everybody, get down, now! You two, down!!”
Stephen and Eris crouched down as an fiery salvo poured in the direction. Stephen raised his hands in an instinctive surrender gesture but Eris grabbed his hands, “Put your hands down, kid, or you’ll lose them, they’re shooting!”
Above, overhead, and past them flew a swarm of munitions.
The Roaring of The Thing stopped.
“Hey, you still out there?,” asked a voice, “come on out, it’s clear. It’s gone. Well, most of it.”
Stephen and Eris helped each other up. Stephen fought the impulse to raise his arms, as a group of people dressed in gear much like ST12’s gear came forward. Their naval camo was darker, no markings, just like ST12. No markings just in case but the gear could still be tracked anyway.
“Sir, two here, wounded, and a third nearby, unconscious.”
“Fan out, and look for other survivors.”
“Yes, sir.”
“Who’s in charge? Who’s your team leader?”
Stephen looked around but said nothing. Eris, who was quiet for a moment, shook her head, and spoke, “He’s dead. Not sure about his second. You from another boat?”
Just as a Medic was about to treat Stephen and Eris, Eris swatted the medic’s hand, “I asked you, you from another boat, who are you?”
“Yes, ma’am. A joint operation, private charter, SLN-Pacific.”
“How is it we don’t know about you?”
“It’s a bit of a stealth research venture, funded by…”
“Outlander Ventures…?,”said Stephen, almost absent-minded.
The one who appeared to be a team leader stepped forward, “you could say that, ma’am, but under the circumstances, I can divulge that this operation is been overseen on behalf of the one you knew as “Mentor”.”
Stephen looked confused, “Men… Mentor? Who is that? I’ve never heard of anything like this from SLN, that’s SLN-Pacific right? This is really Overland Ventures?”
“Well, let’s just say it’s a branch of Overland that’s invested in the Pacific…”
Eris’s expression changed at the mention of “Mentor”, she turned away and asked, “my friend, the one you said was unconscious, where is…?”
“She’s right here….”
Stephen was quiet, and remembered the file, and thought to himself, “the island was the main assignment, but it included tracking his “unsub”, known as Bella. There was mention of “Overland Ventures… what the f….?”
“More wounded, sir.”
“Let’s tend to them, and secure a perimeter. We took chunks out of that thing but…”
“Yeah, it might be back. I thought I took care of it not long ago,” said Eris, as she almost pushed aside the Medic tending to Bella but thought better of her temper, “and then it came back for seconds, trying to finish us off.”
“That’s only because you’ve been tracking for that signal too. I guessed that you would need backup,” said another “Ghost” team-member, another soldier with a uniform marked “SLNP”. Eris stood up, “You?,” as she jog-hobbled over, “You??” Eris grabbed the Ghost solider by one of his vest-armor straps but someone pulled her away.
“It’s okay, let her go, she and I are friends.”
“Friends? You know them??,” asked Stephen, “who, who are they?”
“Stephen, he’s more of a friend you might say of Bella than mine. He and I are, well, more like professional colleagues who got started at the same time. His name, for now, is Pallas.”
“How do you do, Stephen, it’s a pleasure and honor to meet you at last,” said Pallas.
Stephen accepted Pallas’ hand, to shake it, which felt like an odd thing to do in the middle of the jungle after everything that’s happened, but he was feeling shaky, in pain, and gave in to habits.
“Excuse me, I have to go check on her.” Pallas brushed past Eris, towards where Bella was lying, being tended by a medic.
“She’s stunned, sir. She just needs a few minutes. She was in the middle of a lot of kinetic kill energy but she’s unusually strong and doesn’t have any serious wounds. Amazing, really.”
“I’ll say she is. Thank you, Medic.”
Pallas kneeled by Bella, “I sent you here with Eris to take care of things, and take things out like that monster, not for you to ….””
“Shut up please,” said Bella in a soft weaker voice,”besides, I did all the hard work. I softened up the bastard to make it easy for you.” Bella smiled. Pallas squeezed one of Bella’s hands, “that you did, you gave us a chance to test out a bunch of new things. I see you used the Red Box. We had some other things too we brought along.”
“Why didn’t you come with us?”
“I commandeered that boat that’s now sitting off-shore, from SLN-Pacific skunkworks. I exercised my official authority under the Kensei, The Visitor, but it was the Crazy one who…”
“The Mad One?,” asked Bella, before passing out.
“That’s the one. He’s the reason. He always seems to be the reason.”
Part Two
SLN Private Terminal, Japan, On The Edge Of The 22nd Century
Matty took the rail to his favorite place. He took it in, after boarding the Shinkansen, and although he had seen it many times, up close and from far away, Fuji’s peak, everything before he passed by it, and after it. He wanted to take it all in. The crowds and the quiet places. It would be the last time, after everything.
He almost left in the last century but relented and did his best to counter the weight of what he saw as his legacy, as a metalsmith, as someone who made both tools to grow food and the Carbons’ ambitions to touch the sky but also for war. He walked by the University on the Path, and took in the calmness of walking by the river.
Across the bay, to ponder, under a skeletal dome of an exhibition hall, what the Carbons, in this still primitive state, were capable of, even without the interference and intervention of Nodes. Sitting under the sun, quenched by lemony beer, he reminded himself that if didn’t do this, that all that came after that moment, when microscopic electromagnetic fury was unleashed on a target city chosen by meteorological fate, was but a taste of far worse things that were as yet unleashed.
When the Visitor, known as “Kensei” arrived, out of long established habit, Matty rose and bowed. He followed him as they went to pickup snacks at 7-11 and Family Mart, walking and talking. It felt unreal, to walk in public next to the Elder of this Clan but Matty said nothing. A few hours later, at a favorite Izikaya, run by the great-grandchildren of a family he once knew, whose earliest steel grills he forged, they enjoyed native hospitality, and drank cold beer, as they settled on next steps for the plan.
“Meet you in Narita. A straight shot to an SLN airfield. Then, The Island.”
“Yes.”
Part Three
“The Land Between Rivers”, The Deep Past, Unlettered Pre-Mythic Times
She was alone in her favorite place, alone not lonely, for there were the texts, the images, the meaning on the shelves, still witnesses to the ages. The Archival Manifold of the Nodes, known as The Ashes, began far from its primary location.
Long before Uruk, Nineveh, and Ashurbinapal, in that rising land between the rivers, there were the ancient places inside the Earth, all over its face, were the first archives of the mind and spirit, images of the hunt, the rituals, of the lights of the evening canopy, stars, of seasons. They mined for memory and spirit, where others might mine for coal eons later. The mind-face moved from the deep places to hand-made stones of clay, and later, later weaved with reed, cloth, and sheets of fiber. Then it became a temple granary for words, which endured endless strife, since the time of Sumer, among rival kingdoms and the sorrow of floods without end. A library was the storehouse of the King’s mind, what he commanded be remembered, which was as much as possible.
That was the true resting place for that last king of the Assyrian, an epic devotional for Gilgamesh, the story of the flood and how memory and man were cast upon the waters and lived. Over those brief years for a near-immortal, a node known as The Hidden One became The Curate, after accepting that the archival manifolds of the Nodes had their antecedents in these things, for surely the Nodes’ creators must have done this too, when their first star, their first sun of their first home was the only world they knew, millions of years ago, long before living word of genetic code with a new symmetry , to be called Man, ever came to be.
Libraries extended the memory for the living word of Man, the local symmetry of form and mind. That left room for more in day to day life, with memories and stories and rituals and rules and codes in repose in archives.
But libraries do not reproduce, only their readers and scribes do, if allowed. Time and war consumes everything that does not act and reproduce. The static comes down. Libraries were too far removed from that other still form. Trees, Animals, reeds, plants and blood, reproduce but do not make paper, skins and papyrus and ink without the hand of the living word, of the Carbons, known as Man.
Some time later, The Hidden One, created “The Ashes”, after a Ptolemy’s willful neglect of Alexandria, and resolved, to make a plan different from her peers, The Mad One and The Visitor known as Kensei, and create an archival storehouse, to serve the Nodes’ original mission.
She thought of The Visitor, “Kensei”, and remembered. The Visitor never forgave her for Syracusa, for fallen lands of Trinacria, the “point with three stars” that became Sicilia, the heart of a prosperous Greater Greece, fed on Phoenician bones, grown by a series of aristos, tyrants, and finally a people, equal to any in the great “Mare”. Athens wasted its naval treasure, Carthage was not up to the task of savior, so the spoils from the pierced walls of a great Syracusa, first among Greek cities, fell to Roma.
All places are burned by time, The Curate was resigned to that. The key was memory, of the archival manifolds, and perhaps that was the point of the Mission, at its heart - a wandering collection that was a wall against lost memory.
“We remember some moments, with ease, of indelible scenes, of tiny delicate incandescent eternities."
How many libraries burned by Carbons, time’s erosion, and wars?
Someone interrupted The Curate’s reverie. Bella gave a small nod and an effort at a nod in front of The Curate. The Curate, for her part, ignored all gestures, as they were accepted as expected.
“I’ve been assigned for the submarine, SSN Eternal. Eris will be a part of this mission. Pallas has arranged it, we assume for The Mad One.”
“Not the first time, we serve different interests with collaboration. Just remember, as soon as we find out where the Three are, we will take them before The Mad One gets into them. Same with The Visitor.”
“I understand. As soon as I find out who the Graces are, we will take them, or burn them beyond the reach of our manifolds.”
Bella nodded her head, and left.
AFTERWORD
Author’s Notes on what’s going on:
This “Book #3” project, “RETRIEVE”, is meant to be a prequel to two other books, “Box Of Stars” and “Harvest” but this piece could be read as a standalone story.
The prologue for “RETRIEVE”, “An Impossible Island”, was submitted as a short story.
Prologue: “An Impossible Island”, Part One and Part Two, and Part Three, was inspired by writing prompts from the Soaring Twenties Social Club (STSC) creative community, beginning with an STSC Symposium monthly theme of “Beach”.
Chapter 1, “Older Than Bones”, was inspired by the theme, “Dinosaurs”.
Chapter 2, A Love Trinity Denied, was inspired by “Romance”.
Chapter 3, “A Forgotten Circle Of Hades” was inspired by “Superstition”.
Chapter 4, “Reading The Room” was inspired by an image of a wall-sized bookshelf.
Chapter 5, “The Bittersweetness Of Deep Times”, was inspired by “Isolation”.
Chapter 6, “The Weaving Of Split Infinities”, was inspired by “Dreams”.
Chapter 7, “Dead Languages”, was inspired by “Propaganda”.
Chapter 8, “Path Not Forsaken”, was inspired by “Risk”.
Chapter 9, “The Last Word of The World”, considers words as worlds unto themselves.
Chapter 10, “An Intimate Pick Of Desires”, considers the hidden nature of desire.
Chapter 11, “Absent Without Longing”, considers the nature of presence and absence.
“RETRIEVE” chapter and notes will be posted in this Substack, while I edit books #1 (“Box Of Stars”) and #2 (“Harvest”). All will be in the archive, not all will be emailed.)